Tonight I was going through folders on my laptop and came across something I wrote on February 28, 2014, nearly a year ago....
I find that after a long day filled with classes, exams, babysitting, car-pooling, and not being able to eat a single meal sitting down because I’ve constantly been on the go, that I can come back to my room, where the silence is comforting, my thoughts are my conversations and for a moment, the outside world doesn’t exist… this is my home. This is my haven; in a tiny room engulfed in the goodness of my dreams, desires, ambitions, emotions, creative discoveries, and thankfulness for another day to reminisce on.
Tonight I have found myself thinking about religion, and the lack-thereof it in my life. Having spent 13 years in the catholic school education system, I can’t refer to myself as a religious individual and I certainly can not say that after all those years I learned much of anything biblical that has resonated with me. However, I do believe in a lot of things.
I believe in laughing. Laughing at myself, with friends, with family, with strangers. I believe laughing cures pain and scars we are aware and unaware of.
I believe in love. Loving my flaws, my insecurities, and myself. Loving the way my face scrunches up when I laugh and my personality, the bright personality that curves so many lips into a smile. The kind of love where you can’t describe it but it twists your stomach up inside and makes you believe in the possibility of things you never imagined before.
I believe in happiness. Being happy in the good times and being able to smile through the hard times. I believe in the ability to make someone else feel happy even on the days I can’t see the glass as being half full.
I believe in being strong. Not letting the small things hurt you and deter you from the bigger picture. The kind of strength that I see in my parents and myself. The ability to choke back tears and say, “I’m fine” when you’re far from it.
I believe in “thank you’s” and “you’re welcomes”. Being humble and appreciative.
I believe in siblings, a companion to get in trouble with and always have your back. A sibling is the best link to your past and the one you can count on to be there in the future.
I believe in summer, the heat of the sun to color my skin and warm the shores. Running in shorts with bare feet in the backyard and eating sliced watermelon by the pool. Summer nights with good music and starry skies looking over us.
I believe in friends. Friends, who bring us out of our shells, challenge us, support us, love us, and listen to our dreams, mistakes, and bad jokes. I believe in the kind of friends that are spontaneous and carefree yet smart and intuitive.
I believe in books. They take us to another world in another time and give us an escape, a new perspective, and a broader vocabulary.
These are just a handful of the things I believe in. Although I may not have a religion to associate with and grasp in a way that could be understood, I have found my own religion. The kind of religion where a book isn’t referenced for guidance in the top drawer of every hotel nightstand… it doesn’t need to be tangible because it’s in my mind. It’s in my heart. It’s in my spirit. It’s in the way I treat people. It’s in the way I react. It’s in the way I dream. It’s the way I live. This is my religion.
~LD
I find that after a long day filled with classes, exams, babysitting, car-pooling, and not being able to eat a single meal sitting down because I’ve constantly been on the go, that I can come back to my room, where the silence is comforting, my thoughts are my conversations and for a moment, the outside world doesn’t exist… this is my home. This is my haven; in a tiny room engulfed in the goodness of my dreams, desires, ambitions, emotions, creative discoveries, and thankfulness for another day to reminisce on.
Tonight I have found myself thinking about religion, and the lack-thereof it in my life. Having spent 13 years in the catholic school education system, I can’t refer to myself as a religious individual and I certainly can not say that after all those years I learned much of anything biblical that has resonated with me. However, I do believe in a lot of things.
I believe in laughing. Laughing at myself, with friends, with family, with strangers. I believe laughing cures pain and scars we are aware and unaware of.
I believe in love. Loving my flaws, my insecurities, and myself. Loving the way my face scrunches up when I laugh and my personality, the bright personality that curves so many lips into a smile. The kind of love where you can’t describe it but it twists your stomach up inside and makes you believe in the possibility of things you never imagined before.
I believe in happiness. Being happy in the good times and being able to smile through the hard times. I believe in the ability to make someone else feel happy even on the days I can’t see the glass as being half full.
I believe in being strong. Not letting the small things hurt you and deter you from the bigger picture. The kind of strength that I see in my parents and myself. The ability to choke back tears and say, “I’m fine” when you’re far from it.
I believe in “thank you’s” and “you’re welcomes”. Being humble and appreciative.
I believe in siblings, a companion to get in trouble with and always have your back. A sibling is the best link to your past and the one you can count on to be there in the future.
I believe in summer, the heat of the sun to color my skin and warm the shores. Running in shorts with bare feet in the backyard and eating sliced watermelon by the pool. Summer nights with good music and starry skies looking over us.
I believe in friends. Friends, who bring us out of our shells, challenge us, support us, love us, and listen to our dreams, mistakes, and bad jokes. I believe in the kind of friends that are spontaneous and carefree yet smart and intuitive.
I believe in books. They take us to another world in another time and give us an escape, a new perspective, and a broader vocabulary.
These are just a handful of the things I believe in. Although I may not have a religion to associate with and grasp in a way that could be understood, I have found my own religion. The kind of religion where a book isn’t referenced for guidance in the top drawer of every hotel nightstand… it doesn’t need to be tangible because it’s in my mind. It’s in my heart. It’s in my spirit. It’s in the way I treat people. It’s in the way I react. It’s in the way I dream. It’s the way I live. This is my religion.
~LD